SPOILER ALERT!!: Indiana Jones and the kingdom of the lame alien shaped bong

How come the movie reviews in the newspaper and magazines are always written from the perspective of a drunk retarded kid? In our new feature, SPOILER ALERT!!, The HOly Dose weighs in on a summer blockbuster from its high horse & the view is spectacular.

Indiana Jones & the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull

What a total turd of a movie! SPOILER ALERT: It's a hilarious turd of a movie! Easily the funniest movie I've seen in the last 6 months! and I've seen over 3 movies! We were laughing so hard this douche (who was sitting in the reserved for disabled people seats) got so frustrated he up and left his nachos and everything! Or maybe he was just pissed that Indiana Jones has been reduced to a bad X-files rerun that was shitty 15 years ago. I think Speilberg and Lucas are so bored and over it now, to make it interesting they're trying to void out the most trite bullshit the world has ever seen. You'll be amazed when you realize you and each and everyone of your buds thinks the exact same thing at the same exact time... The Crystal Skull 's made of Saran wrap! That being said, I would definitely see it again. On mushrooms. Knowledge is power!
RATING: ********** (BME)